Today’s Word: ‘ING-ING’ as in… yelling, waving, pounding, sputtering, freaking (out) gets us nowhere!
I’ve got this “quick-to-listen-slow-to-speak-slow-to-get-angry” business rolling around in my frontal lobe; that where decisions get made. Yesterday afternoon while driving home I had a “frontal lobe moment” with another driver. Something I did apparently “set” him off. Honestly, I have no idea what it was. He honked (beeped? Is there a difference?) his horn and pulled up on my right side. I thought it might be someone I knew, so when I turned my head and smiled, I realized that I didn’t know him. And it was obvious that I was no friend of his (I’m thinking that this is his loss!). My smiling probably didn’t help, either.
Man, he was hot!
As he matched my speed, he was “ing-ing” at me: yelling, waving, pounding, sputtering, freaking (out). For a moment it was rather comical; all of that “ing-ing” going on while driving 35 miles an hour, fifteen feet apart, our windows up, through two frames of glass and a lot of metal and road noise. Did I mention I had Snarky Puppy cranked up in my cab.
It was really funny. For just a moment. And then it wasn’t. That’s when I felt it kick in: Anger.
Let’s just pause there. Most of you who know me know that I’m really easy going; long fuse. I’m a 7 on the Enneagram (with two 7 wings!) and I’ve got Positivity and Adaptability in my Top Five Strengths. So I’m super-chill. Am I not? So why, on God’s green earth did I speed up when he went on his $&%%# way*?
I’ve clearly got some work to do.
Anger isn’t inherently bad, but it’s important that we learn to manage it well. There are a couple of kinds of anger. Destructive anger is reactionary and often creates even more anger which leads to the death of contentment, peace, and relationships. Constructive anger creates life and health and leads to deeper, healthier relationships.
When we’re slow to anger, we create some space between an action and the reaction; where we find anger dissipate-ing and peace expand-ing. Perhaps these are the healthier versions of “ing-ing” that would get us everywhere…